Have you
heard about the SEX CLAIMS! SEX CLAIMS!
They’re
spinning them again,
Sending
priests and politicians
Swirling
down the drain.
There was a
peer who liked peering,
Let’s call
him Lord Groper
Often put
his hand up
And not
just to speak
But liberal
ladies weren’t all so liberal
When they were
tired of his groping
They all
told their tales
And it all
got leaked
It was
denied, redacted
Admitted
and retracted
Then the
Party said that it might always have known
So Groper
was thrown out,
They
withdrew the whip
And his
cover was blown
And sadly
now Lord Groper has to
Carry on
Groping, all on his own.
There was
father O’Feely
A priest of
deep feelings
Both inside
and outside
The
priestly robe
He tried to
suppress it
But did
keep expressing it
So the
papacy moved him all over the globe
They sent
him to Barbados , then to Mauritius
And when
people there got suspicious
They sent
him to Stoke
And the
papal bureaucracy really believed in miracles
One day
when Feely was stroking
He dropped
dead of a stroke
We like
reading bout the SEX CLAIMS! SEX CLAIMS!
Like to see
them on the telly
Or the
internet screen
When some
self important ratbag
Gets caught
with their pants down
We think
it’s a giggle, we think it’s a scream
And when we
run out of
Celebs and
their SEX CLAIMS!
We sit
around making
SEX CLAIMS
of our own
He did that
to her and she did that to them
We take it
in turns
We’re just
a load of monkeys
Talking
bout our SEX CLAIMS
Whilst the
planet we’re on
Is starting
to burn.
