POSH GAMMON

I like to lie in bath of luke warm water,

Reading The Spectator.

It’s so well written, it’s so right wing,

It wants the empire back,

It’s for people who own things.

And when the mad Russians come,

And The Spectator says they will.

And drop their naughty bomb,

I’m going to die in my bath,

Reading the Truth,

When the fireball rolls,

I’m going to boil like bacon,

Charred paper in my hand,

The last leisured remnant

Of a dead civilisation.